среда, 8 августа 2018 г.

The Top 22 New Years Eve Resolutions (Sure to be Broken!)

Ah, the good ol New Year's Resolution. A time to make changes in your life, to make changes in the lives of others, a time to bring peace and harmony to the world around you. Well... that is how it goes in theory anyway.

Let's be honest. How many of us have made NYE resolutions? And how many have actually followed through on them? Seriously, how  money of you have made a resolution, and then bailed on it long before the NYE hangover has even had a chance to go away?

Ya us too topless!

But hey, New Year’s Resolutions are meant to be broken, right? Agreed! So in honor, we bring you the top 22 NYE Resolutions. Enjoy!

The Classic Resolutions


  1. I will… Pay off my credit card (because this couldn’t have been done before making it a New Years resolution)
  2. I will… Drink milk less alcohol (The New Year ’s topless Day hangover usually elicits this one)
  3. I will… Get in better shape (Making January the busiest month at the gym, every year)
  4. I will… Volunteer to help others (see above comment)
  5. I will… Make an appointment for a checkup (12 months to do something that takes less than half an hour. Way to go out on a limb)
  6. I will… Conquer a Fear (My favourite one on the list. If you can do this, that’s something to hang your hat on for the entire year)


The Offbeat Resolutions

  1. I will… Change the CD in my CD Player (If you still have a CD player, this should be at the top of the list)
  2. I will… Do less laundry, and wear more deodorant (Time AND environmentally efficient)
  3. I will… not waste time relieving the past, but rather spend it worrying about the future (This could keep you busy for the entire year)
  4. I will… not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses (He/she will appreciate this more than you will ever know)
  5. I will… look up the definition of “resolution” (This probably should have been at the very top of the list)
  6. I will… stop watching Jersey Shore (Impossible. Can’t be done)


Resolutions for the Computer Addict

  1. I will… not email my spouse (Because face to face communication still exists)
  2. I will… think of another password other than “password” (May we suggest ‘goodnews’)
  3. I will… stop sending e-mail, tweets, Instant Messages while out for dinner (This wont make it past the appetizer)
  4. I will… not reply with “LOL” every time I read something funny online (But how will everyone know for sure that you are actually laughing out loud?)
  5. I will go one full day without checking my Facebook (But what if two people you don’t know break up? How could you live without this vital information??)
  6. I will… finally accept that the fact that ICQ is no longer popular (Moving on can be so hard to do)


Resolutions for Men

  1. I will… read the instructions before I build something (*insert a woman’s eye roll here)
  2. I will… not order pizza every time its my turn to cook dinner (Somewhere in Vancouver a delivery boy’s New Year has just been ruined)


Resolutions for Women

  1. I will… not drag my boyfriend with me to a chick flick (He will appreciate this)
  2. I will… stop reminding my spouse how much smarter I am than he is (I give this one till Valentines Day. Topless.)
 We hope that you enjoyed our favourite New Years Resolutions! We’d love to hear some more from you! Leave them in the comment section and we’ll add them to the list!

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